I’m dreaming of a warm Christmas
Beneath these several feet of snow.
Where we ski while boating,
While Al Gore’s gloating,
And telling folks, “I told you so.”

I’m dreaming of a warm Christmas,
Anthropogenically I light
Three more duraflames every night,
So this global warming must be slight.

And now another popular favorite, but it’s not quite “I’ll Be Home For Christmas”

I’ll be warm for Christmas
Though it’s one degree,
I’d burn some coal
But some ath-hole
Has capped and traded me.

I’ll be warm for Christmas
Though the cold’s extreme.
Yes, I’ll be warm for Christmas
But only in in Al’s dream.

We don’t want to offend the religion of “Global Warming” but “if the temperature anywhere inside the earth was “several million degrees,” we’d be a star.”

The geothermal gradient is usually quoted as 25–50 degrees Celsius per mile of depth in normal terrain (not, e.g., in the crater of Kilauea). Two kilometers down, therefore, (that’s a mile and a quarter if you’re not as science-y as Al) you’ll have an average gain of 30–60 degrees — exploitable for things like home heating, though not hot enough to make a nice pot of tea. The temperature at the earth’s core, 4,000 miles down, is usually quoted as 5,000 degrees Celsius, though these guys claim it’s much less, while some contrarian geophysicists have posted claims up to 9,000 degrees. The temperature at the surface of the Sun is around 6,000 degrees Celsius, while at the center, where nuclear fusion is going on bigtime, things get up over 10 million degrees.

Source: Settled Science
Al Gore: Earth’s Interior ‘Extremely Hot, Several Million Degrees’